I wrote this to take part after Edward took his test to qualify as a state alchemist. However, Colonel Roy Mustang isn't satisfied with Ed's ability to follow orders until he has been put through Roy's own test. Humor, Action. Please enjoy!
"So... You are now a state alchemist under my command, is that correct?" Roy Mustang asked as he set his coffee down on his desk, eyes focused on the person sitting opposite him. Edward Elric stared moodily back at him, blonde hair falling into his bright golden eyes.
"Yes," he said, looking thoroughly unhappy about it. he was playing absentmindedly with the chain of his silver state alchemist's pocketwatch.
"All right then," Roy said with a wry smile. "It just happens that I have a job that needs doing."
"Yeah, okay. Get on with it."
Roy stood up, shuffling through the various papers crowding his desk and pulling out the one he was looking for.
"Something was stolen from the Central Amestris museum. We have word that the thieves were spotted not far from here. I am trusting you with the order to go and retrieve this object." Roy handed Ed the paper. "The location of the thieves has been typed at the bottom of the page. Make sure you get to the right place."
"Sure," Ed said as he stood and turned to leave.
"Fullmetal, 'yes, sir' will be appropriate. If you're going to serve in the military as a state alchemist, you'd better get used to it."
"Yeah, right. You guys better forget about it. Especially you," Ed said with a scowl as he closed Colonel Mustang's office door.
"What did the Colonel have to say?"
Alphonse Elric was waiting on the steps of Central HQ for Edward to finish his meeting with Roy.
"Somebody stole something from the museum. Mustang wants us to go get it back," Ed said as he pulled on his bright red coat. "You coming?"
"Of course!" Alphonse exclaimed and jumped to his feet with a clank of his metal armor body. "Why wouldn't I?"
Ed shrugged. "Just checking."
Alphonse and Edward headed off in what they hoped was the right way. They had only been in Central City for a couple of weeks and had never come before in their lives. After what seemed like several minutes of mindless wandering, Alphonse pulled Ed to a stop.
"Ed, this is just wasting time. You have to admit we're lost, let's ask someone for directions."
"Well, its not my fault Colonel Bubblehead forgot to give me a map!"Ed shouted defensively as he followed Al to a shop on the other side of the road selling vegetables. A man stood behind tables lined up outside the shop under a banner that said SALE.
"Excuse me sir, could you tell us how to get to this location?" Alphonse asked the slightly bald man as he handed him the slip of paper with the street on it.
"Oh yes, just over two streets and down four blocks," he said and handed the paper back to Alphonse. "Wait... " The man's eyes jumped from Ed's bright blonde hair to Al's armor body. "You're those two alchemists. They say the short one is-"
"WHO YOU CALLING SHORT?! PEA SIZED? MIDGET?!"
"Sorry," apologized Al as he hastily grabbed Ed and dragged him away. A safe distance away, he released Ed.
"You should learn to control your temper."
"I don't care!" Ed answered, panting slightly. "He called me sho-, he called me sh- Well, you know!"
"That's no excuse."
"Come on, we still have to get those thieves," Ed said, changing the subject.
Edward turned down a long alley and passed three blocks and stopped at the fourth. he peered up at the building in front of him.
"A hotel?" Ed turned back to Al. "Doesn't matter. We can do this."
Edward walked up to the wall and clapped his hands together. With a rumble the ground seemed to pull together and stretch upward. Steps formed individually, one after the other. When Ed stood up from the ground again, a staircase stood in front of him.
"Not my best work...Let's go," Ed called, already clambering up the slightly uneven steps. They reached the third floor windows and Edward promptly broke one with a well-aimed kick.
"Not so much for the subtle approach, are you?" Alphonse asked as they stepped through the window. The room was dark, simply containing a bed and wardrobe. Ed crossed the hallway and peered out of the window in the opposite room.
"This hotel must've closed not too long ago. There's still water in the pool," he observed. Just as he stepped back into the hallway, a bullet whizzed past his ear.
Ed rolled to the floor and slapped his hands together and watched as a fist of stone popped out of the wall and knocked his opponent over when they touched the floor.
"You will not get it back, Alchemist!"
Ed scrambled to his feet and faced his new opponent. This one was huge and had his face masked like the other one. Both had been dressed in complete black.
"Come on, then! Take me on!" Ed shouted as he used alchemy to make a sharp sword-like object extend from his automail arm. Just as he was about to attack, a third person jumped from the shadows and tackled him.
The force of the attack threw both of them out of the window. For a moment, time slowed to a crawl and Ed could hear each piece of glass shattering as they tumbled into freefall. Suddenly time seemed to go by too fast again and the ground seemed to come up to meet them. Water flew everywhere as they hit the surface of the swimming pool witha hard slap. Everything was muffled for a moment before Edward struggled free of his attacker's grip and broke the surface, gulping air.
Swimming frantically, Ed reached the edge of the pool and pulled himself out, sopping wet.
Alphonse was running towards him, sounding frightened.
"I'm fine," Ed said and spat out a mouthful of water. "Where did they go?"
"The basement. We have to hurry."
Alphonse led the way as they ran back into the building, speeding through the hallways. As they tumbled down the stairs, they ran into more diguised thieves, but Ed was ready for them this time. At once he aimed a flying kick at the first one's head, and the others were down in seconds. They slammed through the final door and almost ran over the man with the museum artifact.
"Y-You've won! T-Take it!" The little guy said and he thrust the box at him. Edward hastily unlatched the box to find - A cat.
Edward was frozen with combined shock and fury. It was all a trick. Ed didn't even notice as Roy Mustang and the thieves, all demasked now, descended the stairs into the room. The cat stared up at him with yellow lamplike eyes.
"Eeeeoww?" it inquired.
"Isn't it cute?" Alphonse said, picking up the cat. This seemed to stir Ed into motion. He turned to Colonel Mustang.
"I had to give you my own test, to be sure if you could really follow orders."
"WE DID IT ALL FOR A STUPID CAT?! WHAT KIND OF TEST WAS THAT?!" Ed screamed in Mustang's face. Al was laughing.
"Did you really think we were going to give you a real life-threatening situation without knowing if you were capable yet?" Roy asked as he gestured to those people who had been disguised as thieves. He saw Armstrong, Fuery, Falman, Hawkeye and a thoroughly disgruntled Jean Havoc, still soaked from tackling Ed into the pool. This question seemed to deflate Ed a bit.
"Sorry," he mumbled to all of those in thieves' clothes, grimacing at their bruises. Then he turned back to Mustang and cast him a scathing look.
" The least you coulda done was to warn me! Or give me a stinkin' map!"
"You can trust that it won't happen again. Anything I order you to do in the future will be real," Roy said, giving Ed a serious look. This time, Al turned to Colonel Mustang.
"Can I keep the cat?'
I hope you liked my short story. Please comment, and I do plan on writing more eventually. Thanks for reading!