HAGANE NO RENKINJUTSUSHI
HAGANE NO RENKINJUTSUSHI
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The Truth Of The Philosipher's Stone, Will one being get Ed and Al's body back
Shadow the lost ...
post Jan 23 2005, 12:29 PM
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ok i'm going to open with the sure thing here. No the essience of critism is to take what you want to help you and let it be. to accept what you want. not to be forced to. Know as for Hit. when will you learn truthfully your the only one here in which I don't care what you think. You know apperently I just don't know when to stop fighting back. that's what I like about me. And overall though. In this fight I am the loser. Because of the fact you wanted to stop may poor writing and you have. Dead in it's tracks. This little fued has halted any process in which to continue. So you know what. Let me save us both the time of just killing this topic and all of my other ones. So in that case i'll become what I always was. A nobody that's just seems to be at the right place at the right time when help is just needed. I'm so used to this by know. I would say you know but until you've lived life through my eyes you never will. Let me tell you I don't take advice from no one beause in life that a grave risk although it doesn't look it. And i'm not going to do something in which I don't need to do. Well anyway i'll be out back with the other's who just read. PE@CE in the middle east. My broda.
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hagane_no_tokage
post Jan 23 2005, 01:04 PM
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now, class, let's take a look at how this is supposed to look when written in an obscure and confusing language known as english...

QUOTE(Shadow the lost brother @ Jan 23 2005, 02:29 PM)
ok i'm going to open with the sure thing here. No the essience of critism is to take what you want to help you and let it be. to accept what you want. not to be forced to.


see how he has misspelled so many things? just like in the attempts this specimen has made at writing stories, he obviously has no idea how to use a dictionary or even something so simple as a spellchecker...and doesn't take the time to read over what he has read to make sure it makes sense. No the essience of criticism... O_o are we beginning a statement as a contradiction? and what exactly is this essience he speaks of? perhaps, if we try a translated passage, his meaning will become clear.

"Okay, I'm going to open with the sure thing: Know that the essence of criticism is to take what you want to help you and let it be; to accept what you want, and not to be forced to [accept all of it]."

that make more sense, kids? i thought so. notice the poor sentence structure, the patchy and amateurish use of punctuation, and the lack of knowledge on the subject. this criticism he is referring to is defined thus:

crit·i·cism
Pronunciation: 'kri-tuh-"si-zuhm
Function: noun
1 a : the act of criticizing; usually unfavorably b : a critical observation or remark c : CRITIQUE
2 : the art of evaluating or analyzing works of art or literature
3 : the scientific investigation of literary documents (as the Bible) in regard to such matters as origin, text, composition, or history

now if shadow here had understood the definition a little better before looking like an ass in front of everyone, he would have understood that the true essence of criticism...of honest criticism...is--from one author to another--one of the highest compliments that can be given. it means that the more experienced author giving the critique took the time to read through a piece of work that needed help in its composition, and put forth the effort to attempt to assist the budding author in his quest for literary mastery. like the third bullet point of the definition, criticism is merely an investigation...a closer look at not only what makes the story, but what makes us able to read it.

in shadow's case, he lacked both vital points, and therefore begged to be criticized in order to help him improve.

it was his won choice not to accept the advice...but when he decided to become hostile about it, it usually makes people who actually know what they are talking about a little piqued. a true author knows that every word of a real critique is intended not to be malicious (that's what the subsequent flames were for), but to be a bit of a ladder...something to help him continue up the side of the mountain that is literacy.

i guess he didn't bring enough supplies, because it seems shadow's case died before it got anywhere near the summit... dry.gif


QUOTE(Shadow the lost brother @ Jan 23 2005, 02:29 PM)
Know as for Hit. when will you learn truthfully your the only one here in which I don't care what you think. You know apperently I just don't know when to stop fighting back. that's what I like about me.


now this is an interesting passage. note how it has absolutely nothing to do with anything else... O_o and abbreviating the name of his critic not only shows shadow's lack of respect for his betters, but also his lack of effort and outright laziness.

QUOTE(Shadow the lost brother @ Jan 23 2005, 02:29 PM)
And overall though. In this fight I am the loser. Because of the fact you wanted to stop may poor writing and you have. Dead in it's tracks. This little fued has halted any process in which to continue. So you know what. Let me save us both the time of just killing this topic and all of my other ones.


here we have the epiphany...the realization that perhaps he needs a little more work before he is ready to post anything in a forum full of critics and die-hard fans who don't take poor writing lightly.

QUOTE(Shadow the lost brother @ Jan 23 2005, 02:29 PM)
So in that case i'll become what I always was. A nobody that's just seems to be at the right place at the right time when help is just needed. I'm so used to this by know. I would say you know but until you've lived life through my eyes you never will. Let me tell you I don't take advice from no one beause in life that a grave risk although it doesn't look it. And i'm not going to do something in which I don't need to do. Well anyway i'll be out back with the other's who just read.


here we have the ill-attempted self-pity act. dry.gif it never gets them very far, and is a useless literary tool, but it makes for an interesting outpoint.

QUOTE(Shadow the lost brother @ Jan 23 2005, 02:29 PM)
PE@CE in the middle east. My broda.
[snapback]95500[/snapback]



note the closing, which is totally pointless to the piece. what was he thinking, putting this in there? and using such poor grammar to do it? *shakes head* oh, now, class, what is the lesson we have learned from this?

*child raises hand*

yes? little billy?

little billy: "always take the advice of someone more experienced than you with a grain of salt."

very good! so what did shadow do wrong that, ultimately, sealed his demise? sally jane?

sally: he becamse hostile and his thinking became clouded, making him believe the critiques were a personal attack on him, instead of an attampt to better his writing skills.

very good, kids. you are dismissed for the day.


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Quistis88
post Jan 23 2005, 04:19 PM
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Thank you for the valuable lesson, furukage-sensei. biggrin.gif I hope you kids are taking notes.

And just because I have extra pennies, I shall add a cent or two as well.

QUOTE(Shadow the lost brother @ Jan 23 2005, 12:29 PM)
ok i'm going to open with the sure thing here. No the essience of critism is to take what you want to help you and let it be. to accept what you want. not to be forced to.
[snapback]95500[/snapback]

"The [essence] of critism is to take what you want to help you and let it be." I must say that I disagree. What if you don't like the critiques? From the looks of it, you've liked none of them thus far, therefore I can now safely make the conclusion that you cannot take criticism, which directly contradicts the apparently false statement below:

QUOTE(Shadow the lost brother @ Jan 23 2005, 12:20 AM)
And I can take critism
[snapback]95500[/snapback]

It's one thing to be hypocritical, but it's another to be too obvious about it.

QUOTE
Know as for Hit. when will you learn truthfully your the only one here in which I don't care what you think.

Some writer you'll turn out to be, if you dismiss the comments of even one person who has taken wasted his time reading one of your works and even more time by trying to assist you with amelioration. Grateful you are not.

QUOTE
You know apperently I just don't know when to stop fighting back. that's what I like about me. And overall though. In this fight I am the loser. Because of the fact you wanted to stop may poor writing and you have. Dead in it's tracks. This little fued has halted any process in which to continue.

Some writer you'll be, if you stop writing something just because you didn't like what people said about it. Again, if you post something like this here, it means you want comments and criticism. If you don't want anything bad, then don't post. But if you ever finish writing that novel of yours, and you don't want anyone to say anything negative, don't let the editors and publishers see it. I can almost guarantee that they will be at least 10 times more harsh than we have been. So, the only logical solution would be to keep that novel under your mattress! Problems solved.

QUOTE
So in that case i'll become what I always was. A nobody that's just seems to be at the right place at the right time when help is just needed. I'm so used to this by know.

If you're really used to this, then you wouldn't have exploded like a firework that never got off the ground. Unfortunately, that analogy can also be applied to your story.

QUOTE
I would say you know but until you've lived life through my eyes you never will. Let me tell you I don't take advice from no one beause in life that a grave risk although it doesn't look it. And i'm not going to do something in which I don't need to do.

If you don't want advice, you're better off never talking to another person again. "Oh, no! I can't talk to that person about this or that because s/he will give me advice! A grave mistake! I could die! I'd better stay home today!" And what, exactly, is "something in which [you] don't need to do"?

QUOTE
PE@CE in the middle east. My broda.
[snapback]95500[/snapback]

Absolutely irrelevant to your argument. It detracts from the points you're attempting to make, you know? And what, pray tell, is a "broda"?


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hitokiri
post Jan 23 2005, 04:38 PM
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i was the primary cause of him giving up? i feel so... at a loss for words... but i just want to thank god, my momma, my manager and all those who helped me be the bastard i am.

[insert the wrap it up music here]

w..laugh.gif


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hagane_no_tokage
post Jan 23 2005, 08:44 PM
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yes, hitokiri, you've just run off another bad writer, what are you gonna do next???? XD


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hitokiri
post Jan 23 2005, 08:53 PM
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go to disney land... no wait disney land sucks...

maybe i'll just to epcot center and drink around the world


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"argh...my neck is one gargantuan monkey fist..."
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hagane_no_tokage
post Jan 23 2005, 09:00 PM
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in that case...mind if i join ya? laugh.gif


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hitokiri
post Jan 23 2005, 09:03 PM
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all are welcome on the Drunken Rampage World Tour...laugh.gif


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hagane_no_tokage
post Jan 23 2005, 09:11 PM
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sweeeeet. sapporo and toohey's for all! XDD


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Quistis88
post Jan 23 2005, 09:15 PM
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I'm coming, too. laugh.gif

I wonder if Shadow will come back . . .


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xrninja
post Jan 23 2005, 09:35 PM
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QUOTE(hagane_no_tokage @ Jan 23 2005, 08:11 PM)
sweeeeet.  sapporo and toohey's for all!  XDD
[snapback]95987[/snapback]


asahi is my favorite, personally tongue.gif i'll come too, even though i'm underage!


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Hex-Sama
post Jan 23 2005, 09:47 PM
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Holy tuxedo mask, this has really gotten out of hand. I'm sorry for butting my head in, I shouldn't have said anything sad.gif .


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Quistis88
post Jan 23 2005, 10:12 PM
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QUOTE(xrninja @ Jan 23 2005, 09:35 PM)
asahi is my favorite, personally tongue.gif i'll come too, even though i'm underage!
[snapback]96015[/snapback]

Don't worry, I'll buy for you. biggrin.gif

QUOTE(Hex-Sama @ Jan 23 2005, 09:47 PM)
Holy tuxedo mask, this has really gotten out of hand. I'm sorry for butting my head in, I shouldn't have said anything sad.gif .
[snapback]96029[/snapback]

This is a message board, so it's all right to voice your thoughts. smile.gif


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xrninja
post Jan 23 2005, 10:17 PM
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but aren't you only 18, quisty? i'll be 18 in two months tongue.gif


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hagane_no_tokage
post Jan 23 2005, 10:18 PM
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this one shall contribute to the delinquency of her underage companions. laugh.gif ufufufufu... hurray for delinquency!

and hex, honey, don't worry about it... shadow had it coming, and just added fuel to the fire when he got sassy with us. don't worry, we're only vindictive to people who deserve it, and he did. you weren't at any fault. happy.gif


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