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Teen Sex (excluding Married Teens For This Discussion), Acceptable Or Not, And At What Age?, Shall we provide sex-ed? If so, at what age?
Night Watcher Al...
post Jul 1 2010, 07:04 AM
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Okay! My last post was too vague, so here's a more clear one! Why do young people (teenagers) have sex before they are married? What age should sex be allowed at? Should we have sex education in school and what age? Do you think it would make teenagers want to have sex more or less?

EDIT: Night Watcher Alchemist, thank you for being a little more specific with your topic! I changed the title as well as the description so its more to the point. Also changed a few of the poll answers. When you do your titles please make sure that its actually about the topic your making the thread about okay? smile.gif Not titles like "I don't get it" or "what the hell?!" just for example. Again if you're going to post a new thread be sure to send it to me first and I'll give the yes or no! ~Scar

Edit II: Because the conversation has headed in such a direction, I have altered this topics opening post (this one). If this topic is completely different to the discussion you wanted Night Watcher Alchemist, let one of us know, namely me since I made the last edits. Once the topic has been established I will remove all needless edit notes and irrelevant posts - Chi


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Broken Chouchou
post Jul 1 2010, 10:30 AM
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The legal age for sex is 15 where I live, and that's before you're an official adult (which is at 18). And I think that's perfectly fine, talking about at what age you should be allowed to have sex. In the US the legal age is 18, which a bit ridicilous if you ask me, in terms of two 17 - year olds feeling itchy. I doubt far from everyone follows this provision, anyway; if people want to 'do it' they will, regardless of rules made up by the government.

In regards of an adult sleeping with a minor though, the 18 year law is probably healthier than the 15 year one. I don't think it should be legal for someone 30 + (as an example) to engage sexually with a 15 - year old. It's a bit scary, IMO. So there's two sides to it. But I suppose the 18 year rule might actually be better, seeing as in the respect that if you're a minor and want to do it with your minor partner, the rule won't matter much, as I expressed above, but it will still legally restrict creeps from, well, going younger.

Anyway, yes, I think sex before official adulthood (18) is fine. Everyone matures at a different pace. What's important though is knowledge, and that you're sensible.

I think this pretty much sums up my general opinions.


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Night Watcher Al...
post Jul 1 2010, 11:03 AM
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interesting argument, but making things clear, my discussion had started with why do it, yes, but let's look at it this way; yes, I suppose minors having an intercourse, it'd be alright, but the thing is, there's just one question running through my mind with it; have they thought about the consequence. You can't say they're safe, and I've met people who've gotten sick, and have dropped out of school because of pregnancy.

The example is horrible the way high schoolers do it, and that's because middle school kids have started to do it! I'm just questioning if they thought it through, and what went through their heads when they did it.


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Chiyo
post Jul 1 2010, 11:14 AM
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Sex is unsafe if you don't know what you are doing and rush in to things. If you are careful, though nothing is 100%, you minimise the chance of STD's and pregnancy. Sickness is generally a part of pregnancy (and in the case of people at school, probably an excellent excuse for time off as shameful as it would be to use it). What people neglect is the emotional effect, hence why Chouchou mentioned maturity.


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ScarMySoul
post Jul 1 2010, 12:47 PM
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I chose to have sex because it was MY choice. I was young yes, but I was safe about it. If you're properly educated on safe sex, and the outcomes of unprotected sex, such as STDs, pregnancy, etc, then I think its fine. Don't get me wrong I'm married now so the questions here don't really apply to me, BUT, if I had a child in middle school or high school, if they decide to have sex, then hopefully I've educated them enough to be safe. I wouldn't want my child to have sex in middle school, I'd prefer them to wait until they were older. Recently on the news, there was a report about the state of Massachusetts approving the handing out of condoms to 1st graders! Of all of the asinine things you could do, that is the most horrible of them all...

Ultimately it is your choice whether to be abstinent until marriage or to engage in sexual acts, but hopefully you're safe about it.


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Broken Chouchou
post Jul 1 2010, 01:40 PM
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@Night Watcher Alchemist: Well, education on the subject is really important, as people have already mentioned. If you're well educated, know what you're doing (not that anyone knows what they're doing the first time, hur hur), safe and you feel that you're ready for it, I don't see any reason why you should have to wait until you're 18, just because.

@Scar: How old would one be in 1st grade where you liveth? ohmy.gif


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ScarMySoul
post Jul 1 2010, 02:00 PM
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@ Chouchou you'd be like 6 or 7 years old in 1st grade in the US... dry.gif I was so mad when I watching this on Fox News Channel


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Broken Chouchou
post Jul 1 2010, 02:08 PM
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@Scar: That's insane!! We didn't even have any "real" sex ed until 8th grade (about age 14). That on the other hand might be a bit late, perhaps, but of course we weren't completely oblivious up until that point. But 6... Oh dear. At that age I was still an innocent little child *reminisces*


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Night Watcher Al...
post Jul 1 2010, 05:20 PM
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QUOTE (ScarMySoul @ Jul 1 2010, 01:47 PM) *
Recently on the news, there was a report about the state of Massachusetts approving the handing out of condoms to 1st graders! Of all of the asinine things you could do, that is the most horrible of them all...

In conclusion, ultimately it is your choice whether to be abstinent until marriage or to engage in sexual acts, but hopefully you're safe about it. smile.gif


first grade?! have this world gone mad? I thought the state's governor was stupid, but this...ugh! They're going to be traumatized for life, I just know it!


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Chiyo
post Jul 2 2010, 09:12 AM
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QUOTE (Night Watcher Alchemist @ Jul 2 2010, 01:20 AM) *
They're going to be traumatized for life, I just know it!


They won't be. They aren't going up to children and thrusting a condom at them saying "this is for sex, take it". Though I agree it is too young what they are trying to do is achieve familiarity with protection BEFORE it reaches the bedroom. Condoms at that age are alien and strange (or at least they should be) so that when they reach the age they are having sexual intercourse they don't avoid condoms because they have already been introduced to them.


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A Pierrot's Aria
post Jul 2 2010, 09:28 AM
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I find myself more disagreeing with the age people are having sex nowadays. Unless people are religious, and they truly believe that they must wait until they're married, then that's their decision to make; just as non-religious people are free to make their decisions, whether or not it differs from theirs. I'd say they just have to be careful and use contraception in case of unwanted pregnancy and STIs.

I'm fine with teens 16 or over having sex, as long as they're doing it safely, with contraception, to prevent STIs and majorly, unwanted pregnancies- as teen pregnancy is nothing but children having children.

Anyone under that age should certainly be educated in safe sex, and I think that teens wanting to have sex in general nowadays is down to the sexualisation they're exposed to due to things like the media. But I am thoroughly sickened by the idea of the plans that 5 year olds should have sex education. They shouldn't even be thinking about things like that- it just goes back to today's teens and kids being sexualised.

To be honest, at one time I would have said age 18 was a better age, but if I did I'd be sort of being nasty toward my sister- also, she's an example of it being okay as long as protection is in the equation, and on top of that, that fact goes to any couple, no matter their age.. [/font]


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Broken Chouchou
post Jul 2 2010, 10:23 AM
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This thread has gotten through a lot of editing XD

Teen sex, acceptable? Check.

At what age? It's hard setting an age-limit. Everyone matures at a different pace, physically, mentally, and emotionally. I think you need to be mentally ready, and not only physically. And who's to say when that is? I guess only the individual can truly decide that for themselves. But when talking younger teens, you are still a child, and likely your judgement isn't as good as you think it is. It's difficult. I'll leave this decision for the parents to discuss with their kids ^^;;

The legal age of 18 is good, though, for reasons mentioned in previous posts.

Shall we provide sex-ed? YES. This is really important.

At what age? 11- 12-ish? The first I heard of sex from school was in bio-class, when learning of "birds and bees". And then when watching educational movies about puberty, which we were slowly but surely approaching. And down that road it was. Proper sexual education though, specifically referring to itself as that, when educated about contraceptive methods, going through the full catalogue of STDs and all that, wasn't until I was 14. I think a bit earlier would be fine.

And then I just wanna add that A Pierrot's Aria said things a lot smoother than I did (first part of her post). Completely agree with her ^^

EDIT: Actually, after some thinking, I believe 15, the legal age here where I live, is a good limit. Below that, and I think that may be too young. But as I already said, it comes down to the person... (there's a lot of 'buts' in my posts I notice)

@A Pierrot's Aria - Interesting what you about the sexualisation. I can't say whether the sex (in all it's forms) in the media directly affects 'the actual 'wanting to have sex'. But it surely has us exposed to it in low ages. So in that way I suppose it might contribute. But reasearch also shows that we're reaching puberty earlier and earlier, and that has to be a big factor as well.


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A Pierrot's Aria
post Jul 2 2010, 12:14 PM
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QUOTE (Broken Chouchou @ Jul 2 2010, 06:23 PM) *
@A Pierrot's Aria - Interesting what you about the sexualisation. I can't say whether the sex (in all it's forms) in the media directly affects 'the actual 'wanting to have sex'. But it surely has us exposed to it in low ages. So in that way I suppose it might contribute. But reasearch also shows that we're reaching puberty earlier and earlier, and that has to be a big factor as well.


Most of the time it probably doesn't, but it also affects the way young girls and boys dress, as well as inform them of things that even I didn't know when I was their age. You know, they know all these vulgar and sexual words and they want to look 'sexy', and perhaps in some cases, does make them want to have sex. I'm not sure, I guess it depends on their exposure. xD It's freaky to hear 9 and 10 year olds talking about sex and having sex, and similarly it just doesn't seem right for people under 16 to go around doing it...It just seems kind of...a shame, really... (Not as in being 'shameful' per se, but more, a shame because they feel they need to go on and do that so young).

And your second point is interesting too...I'm not sure whether or not you mean physically reaching puberty, but I find it is clear to see that children, when they reach their early teens, are growing up too quickly these days- I find they do want to get into a relationship, have sex and even some occasions, start a family. It's like they don't want to have a fun-filled, easy going childhood, they're so concerned about being adult and doing adult things.


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Broken Chouchou
post Jul 2 2010, 12:42 PM
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QUOTE (A Pierrot's Aria @ Jul 2 2010, 09:14 PM) *
Most of the time it probably doesn't, but it also affects the way young girls and boys dress, as well as inform them of things that even I didn't know when I was their age. You know, they know all these vulgar and sexual words and they want to look 'sexy', and perhaps in some cases, does make them want to have sex. I'm not sure, I guess it depends on their exposure. xD It's freaky to hear 9 and 10 year olds talking about sex and having sex, and similarly it just doesn't seem right for people under 16 to go around doing it...It just seems kind of...a shame, really... (Not as in being 'shameful' per se, but more, a shame because they feel they need to go on and do that so young).


Oh okay, then I understand what you mean ^^ In this regard I fully agree that our overly sexualised society is doing all that you say it does, I see it myself. But when a 10 year old talks about sex, or if they're saying they 'want to have it', I seeeeriously doubt they have any idea at all what they're really talking about, they just "want it" because it's "cool", and because the pretty girls on TV have it (in case of girls). At 10 you don't even understand the concept of sex, and wanting it.

... Right? unsure.gif I pray so, at least. Otherwise, the world has changed more than I feared.

But yes, it's tragic that people want to grow up so fast. Childhood is something precious that you should treasure while it lasts. Because we'll all grow up one day anyway, whether we like it or not. Why want to hurry that process! Of course it's easy to say this from the perspective of an almost-adult XD

QUOTE (A Pierrot's Aria @ Jul 2 2010, 09:14 PM) *
And your second point is interesting too...I'm not sure whether or not you mean physically reaching puberty, but I find it is clear to see that children, when they reach their early teens, are growing up too quickly these days- I find they do want to get into a relationship, have sex and even some occasions, start a family. It's like they don't want to have a fun-filled, easy going childhood, they're so concerned about being adult and doing adult things.


I actually meant physically. All these toxins and chemicals we're being subjected to daily is a theory on why it's happened/happening. Which reminds me, a few days ago I read an article in the newspapers about a girl who got her period at age 3.5. And there wasn't a disease or anything like that behind it; her hypophysis had simply started producing hormones that early, without any apparant reason.

Anyway, growing up faster physically probably affects you psychologically too. But I think it's more to blame on society in this case, which I understand is your main point.


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Night Watcher Al...
post Jul 2 2010, 01:17 PM
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@A Pierrot's Aria - You make an interesting argument! In all honesty, yes, I agree that one should be smart; I have friends who have done this. They are younger than sixteen, and to put it blunt, got lucky.

When I posted the poll, I wanted to see what everyone had thought of the concept. I truly didn't want to be biased towards anybody, but looking at what's said, one can easily say that even then it was vague (I thank ScarMySoul for the help).

I try my best, but in all truth, I still don't quite understand the intimidation, which is why I started the topic. I think I'm getting it a little more, so thanks to all!


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