HAGANE NO RENKINJUTSUSHI
HAGANE NO RENKINJUTSUSHI
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Unimaginable Cruelty, One-shot angst
ElvishVamp
post Aug 23 2005, 09:39 PM
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I just finished my first Hagaren fanfic! It's a one-shot, since I never seem to finish anything longer than one chapter, which is why I usually stick to fanart (which is on deviantart under the same username if anyone is interested).

I wasn't sure if I should put a link to it or just post it here...*sweatdrop* Like I said, I usually do fanart.

There are no pairings and no spoilers that I noticed, but be warned there is character death. Anyway, enough of my rambling! Please tell me what you think! Any kind of feedback is appreciated!




Unimaginable Cruelty



It wasn’t fair.

That was all Edward Elric could think as he stared into the cold, dead eyes of his killer. It wasn’t fair how that bastard homunculus was using that form. It wasn’t fair how accurate he was, not only in his appearance, but in his mannerisms as well. The only thing that gave him away, that told Ed that this was in no way who it seemed, where those eyes, so cold and dead. Those eyes didn’t belong on his little brother’s face.

Two weeks. It had been almost two weeks since they had taken Al away. Two weeks of virtually no sleep, no food, just constant searching. He had neglected his health so much that it was a miracle he had lasted long enough to get here. Not that it mattered now. He had gone through hell to get here, yet here he was, dying, that damned homunculus taunting him with an image of the body he had promised to return Al to someday, but now knew he never would.

He wasn’t sure if it was the unimaginable cruelty or the sick irony of his current situation that tortured him the most.

His vision was getting blurry, and he knew had lost a lot of blood. He could see it all over the floor. Not that the fight had lasted long. Envy hadn’t bothered to play mind games with him this time, as he usually did. Maybe he thought the form he’d chosen would be enough.

Whatever the case may be, the homunculus had done only what he knew was necessary to make the kill. That didn’t mean Ed had made it easy for him. He had put up one hell of a fight, but in the end it was pointless. He couldn’t seem to concentrate against his brother’s human form. He never could win against Alphonse.

Edward felt like he should be trying to think of some way to keep fighting, but he knew it was already over. He could taste the blood in his mouth, and his body wouldn’t respond anyway. As pathetic and childish as it seemed, that was all he could think in his final moments. It just wasn’t fair.

* * * *

Alphonse Elric stared at the body in front of him. It looked exactly like his brother, but he knew it wasn‘t. It couldn’t be, because Ed had already been killed, and he had had a front row seat. Being given his human body back with the knowledge that it was done through the sacrifices of other humans, had been painful enough. Seeing his older brother, the only family he had left, slaughtered right before his eyes had been too much. He’d just snapped.

He knew he wouldn’t be able to defeat the homunculi on his own, but at that point, he simply didn’t care. As long as he did some damage, he decided, it was worth it. He’d found it to be much easier than he’d anticipated to kill. His blatant disregard for his own life had probably helped in that respect.

That damned homunculus. As if wasn’t cruel enough that he’d had to watch his brother die the first time. Not that it really mattered. He knew he’d have to go through that many more times, unless of course he died first.

He hated the idiot who came up with the law of equivalent exchange. The two of them had sacrificed so much, yet nothing had ever been given in return. The only thing he could be thankful for was that Ed would never have to see him this way, but that was no gain. He wouldn’t have been this way if Ed were still alive.

He knew the homunculus wasn’t dead. It couldn’t be, not from that, but Envy wasn’t getting up. He didn’t understand it, but he couldn’t wait around all day. Alphonse strode out of the room with only one coherent thought in his mind, a thought which he felt inclined to share with the empty hall he now occupied.

“It isn’t fair.”


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Trisha Elric Conspiracy Theorist
My Deviant Art Page: Go. Look. Comment.
Unimaginable Cruelty: angst angst emo emo (one-shot, character death)
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Squirrel of Doom
post Aug 27 2005, 05:14 PM
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Woah...tragic man... ohmy.gif


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FMAlover^
post Sep 8 2005, 03:24 AM
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Its not bad though...I don't know how to give advices as i don't write fics ^.^;;


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lialiakicks
post Sep 9 2005, 06:43 PM
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That was evil ElvishVamp. ;___;

I only have one question. How exactly did Al see Ed die? Was he in the room or something? *too tired to figure this out* Gah, I don't understand. >_<

It was well written though. ^^


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[DECEMBER 2006 UPDATE!!!]

Elvish Vamp's Hagaren Manga Music Video can be found HERE!!!Please leave comments and suggestions in her "Manga AMV" forum!


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ed's numbuh ...
post Oct 5 2005, 02:41 PM
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ohmy.gif sad.gif how cruel...that was so sad i almost cried ;_; (i did'nt have that great of a day today so it made me even more sad) ;_;

GREAT JOB!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! smile.gif


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Kael
post Oct 6 2005, 04:08 PM
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That is one hell of a tragic story... If my assumption is right, Envy turned into Ed and "died" in front of Al, which made Al kil Ed, who he thought was Envy. However, Ed was really Ed, and he thought Al was Envy. Am I correct, or do I make no sense whatsoever?
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ed's secret ...
post Oct 8 2005, 03:10 PM
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Kael: ...What?
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Luckyalchemy27
post Oct 13 2005, 09:33 PM
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Holy. Crap. *cries and laughs at the same time*

I hate you for making me cry, but I love you for giving me my daily dose of angst.


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ElvishVamp
post Oct 14 2005, 12:18 AM
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Kael, you are absolutely right! happy.gif

I actually started drawing a pic to go with this fic! Such Elric abuse....


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Trisha Elric Conspiracy Theorist
My Deviant Art Page: Go. Look. Comment.
Unimaginable Cruelty: angst angst emo emo (one-shot, character death)
Hagaren MMV
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Ph34r m3h 1337 f14m31!!!
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Karlykitten
post Nov 12 2006, 07:27 AM
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Oh. My. God. That's amazing. And really, really sad!


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slightly-smiling
post Aug 22 2007, 12:27 PM
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youre under arrest for elric abuse


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Slightly smiling, yet nothing to hide,
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a spirit that soars, yet a heart lay broken
a future untold, but a life hath forseen
it all lays here in the words left unspoken
of a life or a void that used to be me.


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tsimehcla lateml...
post Aug 23 2007, 08:59 PM
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That was really really really really depressing, but also really really really really good. (Sniffle) You killed Ed!!!!! Still, awsome fic. If you ever find my fanfic, I'd appreciate if you just read it. It's quite the opposite mood to your story, but probably not as good. Really, awsome dude.


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"THAT'S NO EXCUSE TO STRIP ME TO MY UNDERWEAR IN PUBLIC!"- Edward Elric
"Sieze the day, cause you could be dead tomorrow."- Buffy
"I am always sure, I'm just not always right."- Catseye Yellow
"All is one, one is all."- Izumi Curtis
"The first rule of alchemy is the Equivalent Exchange."- Edward Elric
"You know what they say about payback? Well I'm the b*tch."- Winifred Burkle
"If the apocalypse comes....beep me."- Buffy
"Get ready to get dirty"- Mike Rowe
"I reject your reality and substitute my own"- Adam Savage

"Life isn't fair."

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